In Your Life
by Socrates7727
Summary: "Aw, Ziva, do you really consider me 'in your life?" One question, and Tony suddenly faces much more than just a teasing, flirty partnership. And maybe, just maybe, something good? Tiva! One-shot, rated T for swearing.


AN I don't own NCIS or any of its characters. Tiva! One-shot fluff.

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"Well, at least I am glad to have someone in my life as romantically dysfunctional as I am." Tony smiled when she did, though that didn't mean he didn't catch it.

"Aw, Ziva, do you really consider me _in your life_?" She flashed him another smirk but when she saw the seriousness to his question-though he tried to make it seem half joking-she stopped. Was she hesitating? Thinking? Regretting the way she'd phrased it, hoping he hadn't caught it?

"Of course I do," she said finally, keeping her voice low. "You're one of the only men who ever has been."

"Hey, Ziv-a-Diva," Her eyes turned on him like laser sights, just waiting for him to say the wrong thing. "Okay, so that's a no for that nickname. Noted. But, here we are, talking, nevertheless." Her anger turned into a little smirk and she kicked him under the desk to get him to go away.

"Yes, we are talking. Did you have a subject in mind or are we just going to discuss the air quality in here?" But he sat in his chair and rolled over to her. Let's see her try to kick him under the desk when he was on wheels!

"Well, Ziver," Another glare. "No? That's Gibbs' thing, I suppose. Sweetheart it is, then! So, sweetheart, I've got a question for you." She squinted at him-a little half glare-but she didn't say anything else so he kept it. Sweetheart.. He was definitely going to use that.

"What is the question?" Finally, her attention was fully on him and not at all on the paperwork. He leaned forward onto the desk with a little smile.

"What you said earlier… did you mean that?" He was halfway scared of her answer, and halfway already hating himself for asking it. But he wanted to know. It had been simmering in his gut all day, just begging to be asked.

"What? About Romero and the drug problem?" He gave her a look. "Oh, you mean about the men in my life." Gibbs had left an hour ago to go meet one of the ex-wives, number three if Tony had to guess, and McGee was down in the lab with Abby playing with some kind of technology. They were alone-it was already after hours. She seemed very aware of that, even as she leaned forward on the desk to match his posture with a little smirk.

"Yeah, that one. Did you mean that?" He regretted asking but now he had to know. He'd said it once, enough to get the initial anxiety and panic over with, but now he needed to know. Needed to hear her say it.

"That I consider you in my life? Or that you're one of the only ones?" That was a flirty tone, wasn't it? It sounded like it, and if anyone would know it would be him, but it was Ziva. She wasn't flirting with him, was she? Or, if she was, it was a joke.

"Both… Either." She smiled, leaning forward just a little bit more. Her face was inches from his, he could feel her breath on his face just slightly. Just enough that it was incredibly hot. Dear lord he should not have started this conversation like this! She just smirked.

"Mmm I see. Well, you're my partner so you're definitely in my life-but you knew that. Which leaves the second part…" She leaned forward even closer, but he didn't close the distance even if he really wanted to. Even if he had to stop himself multiple times. Even if the way she bit her lip and rolled it between her teeth was deliberately sexual.

"So?" She smirked, tongue darting out over her lips as she locked eyes with him.

"So, why does it matter to you if you're one of the only men in my life, Tony?" All of his energy was going into not asking that question. He really, truly, did not want to think about why this was important to him. Because if he did, that meant admitting that he had a crush on her, even if it was teeny tiny and barely there. And there was no way he was going to tell her that.

"Because it means less competition if I am." Where the hell did that come from!? He almost smacked himself for saying that especially to her of all people but she just smiled a little wider. Both at the words, and at his obvious discomfort.

"Competition for what, Tony?" Her finger reached up and trailed along his jaw, just barely touching the corner of his mouth when he smiled. "Tony?"

"One day, sweetheart," Her eyes softened. "You'll meet a man who deserves your love. I hope to be in the running." What the fuck was he doing?! Was he _trying_ to freak her out!? Or get punched!? His heart was racing in his chest, trying to smash out of his ribcage even harder the longer they sat there like that, just centimeters away.

"Oh, Tony, I've already met that man and you aren't in the running." That stabbed in his chest like a damn dagger. He grit his teeth and tried not to wince but he couldn't cover it entirely. She leaned just a little tiny bit closer. He felt like he was going to scream or cry or throw up or… something. Something not good.

"Oh." That was all he could think to say. "I understand." She cupped his jaw and drew him a little closer, so their noses touched.

"Don't sound so sad, _sweetheart_ ," She smiled. "You aren't in the running because there _is_ no running. There's no competition." His stomach started to churn but wait, he didn't understand. What was happening, honestly?

"What?" Her smile ghosts just a little closer, barely brushing his lips with her own. He almost moaned right then and there.

"Tony, there's no competition. You're not one of the only men in my life, you _are_ the only man in my life." She connected their life, if only for a moment, but Tony felt like he was going to pass out because Ziva-fucking-David was kissing _him_!

"Sweetheart, where the hell is this coming from?" He wanted her to say it was a joke, that she was just messing with him. He didn't want this to be real. It made his stomach churn in a way he didn't like, a way that was too _real_. Too serious. She smiled and thumbed his cheek.

"Don't look so worried, _sweetheart_ , I just told you you were right. Isn't that a good thing?" It was supposed to be a good thing, wasn't it? But it wasn't. This was too real, too much, and he wanted to run from it all. He wanted to toss back a couple beers and take home the hottest girl he could find and forget about Ziva because he didn't want real. He wanted shallow, meaningless sex. Not this. Not her.

"Yeah, sorry." But his voice had lowered and she noticed instantly. She pressed their foreheads together, trying to ground him or calm him down or make him look at her but he was still freaking out. She frowned at him.

"You're upset. Why are you upset?" He hesitated. "Ah, wait, I understand. You're panicking, because I'm not some girl in a bar that you can spirit away-

"Ghost, Ziva. The word is ghost."

"Spirit, ghost, whatever. The point is that this is too big, too scary, for the famous womanizer. I get it, I'll leave you to your 'female friends' then." She started to lean back, to pull away, but no matter how terrified he was he couldn't let her do that. He'd dreamed of this moment. Not consciously, not wittingly, but he had and he couldn't let it slip through his fingers that easily. He cupped the back of her neck and pulled her back to him.

"Ziva, wait." She did, surprisingly, and just waited for him to speak. "I know how to have sex, how to hook up."

"You're not helping yourself, Tony." But he just sighed, pressing their foreheads back together because nothing else felt like it could steady him in that moment.

"I know how to hook up, but I don't know how to have a relationship." That made Ziva hesitate.

"You dated that one girl, when you were undercover for Jenny with la grenouille." He rolled his eyes, even though she was only an inch from his face.

"Jeanne, yeah, but that was different. I didn't have to care, I didn't have to worry about fucking it up." Ziva slowly bit her lip and nodded like she understood suddenly. That was it, he realized. Tony was terrified out of his mind because he didn't want to fuck this up, not with her-not Ziva. Any other woman, any of the interchangeable ones when he was slightly drunk, but not Ziva.

"It's okay, Tony. You can fuck this up a thousand times if that's what it takes, it's okay. You know how to hook up, I know how to bounce back from things. If I can stay for years with men I don't even _like_ , no matter how many times they screwed up, just because my father asked me to, I can stay with you through a hundred mistakes." Tony felt like he was going to pass out again. This couldn't be happening, this wasn't real. Ziva, of all people, was not sitting here in an empty office reassuring him about his commitment issues.

"Why?" She pressed a kiss to his forehead but it was short and sweet-chaste.

"Because, contrary to popular belief, I do actually like you Tony. As a person."

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